Anakana Schofield – Author of Martin John and Malarky

Hot water bottles MIA

I have managed to lose 3 red hot water bottles, identical in size, in 150-300 square feet of space and am wondering if it’s some kind of certifiable Guinness World record for quantity of lost hot-water bottles vs sq ft?

Fortunately, I still have the single blue hot water bottle (commandeered by one of my in house males) and the, only to be used if the earth quakes, 55 year-old-found-object hot water bottle that is, let’s say, mature in its obviously thinned skin.

I have caved in and turned on the heat. It answers my earlier query about whether winter would announce herself. Today she did it. I was frozen and shivering while wearing two cardigans and a parka, supposedly good up to -20 made of goose feathers, inside a shop in Chinatown. The women working there laughed at me as I protested the sudden onslaught of winter. She’s here. Landed. Winter reading rituals now commence.

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