Anakana Schofield – Author of Martin John and Malarky

My brain has a hard time with swimming and with numbers.

Today I endured an extended bout of confusion searching for 1016 E Hastings which I understood was the first City Hall. I went in search of it, after meeting one of the artists and enjoying a great exchange with him about my approaching Unit/Pitt project Rereading the Riot Act.

How and ever a number of things occurred in trying to find this blessed 1016 address. A woman, Brenda it turned out, in a wheelchair asked a fella to push her up the street to the Balmoral but he was waiting on someone, so I offered to push her. She told me the story of how she was recently hit by a car and the injuries she sustained. We had a lively exchange. At the Balmoral she instructed me on how to get her chair inside and a fella greeted her and held the door for us. Several other people called out to her and then a man who worked in there came over. He’ll take care of me from here, she said.  The fella, who had a warm gummy smile, thanked me. I was glad of the chance to see all this, given the pain the woman must have been suffering — there had to be some small comfort in being acknowledged by those around her.

I continued walking and walking and walking until finally I realized I’d be long walking at this rate and was further confused as to how the Mayor in 1935 had skipped so dandily over to read the riot act at Victory Square given the epic trek that I’d succumbed to.

Eventually I gave up and went in search of teeeny bookshop I’d been meaning to visit. No luck. I simply could not find anything today. I decided to drive and search for this 1016 E Hastings, which I did and realized there’s no way this could be the place I was hunting for.

The Waldorf hotel loomed on the corner so I decided to stop in for eggs and a google search. En route however a bunch of men were gathered in the car park opposite so I went to investigate what was happening. That’s another sceal.

Inside navigating a dubious internet connection, it transpired that bloody hell I was supposed to be looking for 16 E Hastings. I reassured myself that 1016 was the Battle of Hastings until about 20 mins later, a friend sent an email saying “mais non that was 1066”

It was a 1016 type of day. Four hours of it. I am coining this phrase. “A complete 1016 situation”.

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